Well this seems to be a popular word. I haven't been in to write much these days out of anger to as what I might say when I get here. Then I remember thatsa what blogging is about to get my anger out.

Muder they say with Terri. Her husband Murdered her. What gives people the right to say such a thing. This is so cold and heartless. This man has had to watch his wife's body lay there in this vegative state for 17 years and look after her to the best of his ability knowing this is not what she wanted. Her husband. The man she slept with. Had sex with. Shared intimate moments with. Had sweet conversations with. Who shared she never wanted to be like that.

Then you have the assinine assholes who say," I know Terri and thats not what she would have wanted at all." Who are these people to say this? Then to scream murder! People are sick to put this man through this pain over and over again only for thier own PUBLIC GAIN. Oh yea they all get a little public TV spotlight and hey the brother and sister will get a book and movie deal. You watch and see in a couple years time a movie or book will come out and one if not both thier names will be on it. So don't tell me nothings to gain from her family from this. Just look into the eyes of the brother and sister and you can see somehting is not right there.

Yet they scream murder. What the husband must face and nobody even looks at that.

I feel for the husband and go shame on those who scream murder. Who are we to judge what was said in the privacy of thier bedroom. He even turned down the million so he could fulfill his late wife's wishes. Did anyone stop to look at that?

No everyone just steps back and goes MURDERer. Americans and the Vatican are too judgmental in all this and maybe grandstanding for TV too much and should look at the reality.

With all the money aspent on this. HOW MANY CHILDREN COULD YOU HAVE FED OR EDUCATED> Oh yea don't worry about them lets just scream murder to a person who has already been through 17 years of hell and put him through more because he folloewed through on what his wife wanted. Too bad mom and dad. My heart goes out to you in this hour of pain but my heart is with Terri's husband and so are my prayers.

Bad enough I put up with bullshit everyday with those close to me that hide it continuslly by justifying what they do by using new age comments by saying I need to go within and see what it is that I am doing that I need to look at in my own personal life.

Man when are people going to take responsibility for thier own personal bullshits in thier won lives and get rid of the shit so they can move forward and quit blaming others.

Gee I am sooooooooooooooooooo begining to dispise this bullshit life I live in and all the crap going on around me.

The Terri thing and the bullshit society does to not look at thier own stuff and scream murder at one person fulfilling his wife's wishes and thinking we know what his wife really wanted.

The bullshit going on around my own life and nopbody wanting to look at the reality of it.

I try my damndest to be the spiriual being, the lightworker, the sweet person everyone wants me to be but today, I don't want to be.. My room mate lies to the other one or the other one knows but just stays blind to it and I'm not to say anything out of friendship because if I do I'm reflecting my own stuff then and that why I feel the world is a shit hole today and I don't know what's real and what is not. I don't know what's spiritual and whats religion.

I don't know if having prostitues and crack is OK because gambling is OK and then I look at myself giving up smoking ciggerettes, pot and drinking to get my life in order to watch everyone else doing these things and not allowed to say anything about it because it only creates bullshit.

I'm really confused with life.

I have spiritual leaders doing one thing and teaching another thing and I'm supoose to accept that as being OK and not allowed to say anything.

I'm so confused.

Blogging is the only place I have to just ramble my anger away and then when I'm done I ask myself. AmI gossiping at this point?

No this is my diary. No it's not because others vcan read it.

Damn. I'm a minister who can't even answer my own questions yet, I always seem to be able to answer for others when they ask. Why can't I answer my own questioons? Why can't I be brave enough to say to my room mate shit or get of the pot?

Why can't I just move forward. I'm too old for all this crap yet here I go again tripping over Terri's death and knowing she is in a better place. Her Husband knew that and why can't others accept that. Murder.

As I can see I have enough of my own stuff with out worrying about Terri but i watch the news and it comes up.

My room mate who is also suppose to be a friend caught me blogging and said," how stupid, haven't you got better things to do?' Yea I almost said if you would hear me as a friend I wouldn't have to blog," but hey he always says the same thing, when it comes to his partner he doesn't want to hear anything he'll deal with it. So what can one say?

Oh well life is like that and me being a comedian, I don't even feel funny these days.

Life is life, we make it as it is dealt to us or we make it as we want. Sometime we just need to take a few of the roadblocks down to get past.

I know I said I'd leave it after yesterday but whoa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Blaming the husband for abuse and neglect just to get the courts to look again. Doesn't anyone see the pain the husband has to go through or has gone through to make the decisions he has already made. Sure he has moved on, but isn't that what life is about and maybe he and Terri had discussed this who are we to question what to people in the privacy of there lives discuss at home and to say yea or nea is not up to us. My God and and I use that as I pray. Please forgive those few handfuls of people I see in front of the cameras that belong to some OVER ZEALOUS RELIGOUS GROUP plying pressure on governments to do things there way or else kind of attitude. Gee and if the government listen, that makes me think if any of these elected officials get re-elected then what the majority of people were saying about all this during polls was lies. I watch the polls and the majority of the public want Terri to go to a better place with God and a very small minority wish to keep her in a garden of vegatables. Now as I stated if the the minority win then it shows me Religion runs the good old USA and I'm a minister saying that and I believe politics need to stay out of government but obviously not in the states. Democracy you cry out for other countries. Listen to the People your president cries out to the Middles East yet he doesn't listen to his own. MY, MY what a hypocrite.

If I lived in the States I would gather up all the homeless starving children off the street and bus them to the wWhite House or to Jeb Bush's front lawn and say it's odd how you can find the money and resources to spend trying to reinsert this ladies feeding tube. (Whom has shared with her HUSBAND she never wished to live like that) Yet you won't find the time to pass no law to force feeding tubes into the mouths of these starving children.

YOUR government is starving innocent children every day to death in your own back yard but, no a small handful want to force a tube back into a lady that didn't really want it in the first place.

Can someone please explain the politics behind this.

Starve millions of children to save a cucumber. Please explain this, I don't understand. Here in Canada if we say no to one of our politics, it's no and it doesn't go any further. Look what happened with the missle defence plan. We said no and he listened.

Seems down there politics get elected then do what they want after especially if they have a brother who is the president.

Now I've about said what I have to say on the subject and I only came in and needed to let off steam for my benifet because I can't understand when people don't get what they want how they suddenly accuse others of abuse and neglect after 15 years. It's sad enough that he had to watch his wife go through all this but to pay people to lie about abuse jst to get courts to go over documents again and again.

I always say the one who is not attacking is usually the one telling the truth where as the ones that scream foul play and attack people all the time are the ones you need to watch.

I'll just be glad when it's all over. One thing I would like to know and I'm sure CNN or FOX will find out for us once it's all over is how much of the Taxpayers money did this all cost and how many starving children would have it fed to keep alive.

Well maybe I do watch too much TV and I need to get a life. I just finished watched Jeb Bush willing to pull Florida senate back in to play to pass a bill to reinsert a tube to feed this lady in this vegative state and all this money and I say lots of it. Good Taxpayers money that everyone down there when I watch the news is complaining all the time they don't have enough of is paying for. Here they are also paying the courts to mull over this only to deny each time. Now don't forget the lawyers fees that the government Jeb Bush has to pay for and the Circiut court lawyers and all they're teams. I'm sure none of them are free. We know what they charge. I'm also going to say they have a team of doctors that mull over the same video over and over to determine her condition. Which I feel is a joke. A video. My, my. I hope no doctor determines my fate that way. Anyways as I go on and add up the American Taxpayers dollars.

Now I wish to say this who inserts the feeding tube into the starving child homeless living in a damp alley out of a garbage bin. Which politician goes out of thier way to pull the senate together late in the evening to pass a bill to save the life of that child or all the children living like that and where are all the government people getting them off the street to save them and place them in homes and care for them as much as they care doing for this person lying there probably wishing her husband would carry out her wishes.

Thats why I'm angry in Canada. I see politicians running around doing all this for this one person who probably did say these things to her husband before this happened only now to be a toy for her Family to get a book deal and politicians to do a little granstanding.

Another thing don't the politicians watch the polls. We do up here and the majority and I repeat, the majority of the public want the politicians to stay out of it so what does that say for politics down there. It says beware of religious groups they have more power. Not the general public and that the general public has no opinion down there only religous groups do.

I just wish to share a little story and then I will say nothing more about this case because it bothers allot of us up here to see how callous your politics are down there to a husbands request.

I was on our public transit yesterday and I swear this is a true story.

There was a mother and her two children. A girl of about 6-8 and the boy must have been 8-10. Anyways it was the boy that broke my heart and brought tears to my eyes. Anyways I want to get it right so here goes. He said," Mom you know that lady on TV in the states who everyone is trying to make live?' and his mother said,"yes sweetie",. " Well mom," hesaid,"if something like that happens to me, please, I don't want you and Dad to make me live like that". The mothe replied"But honey your my son, I'll do anything to keep you don't talk like that." Which he said," but mommy look at her thats not living and if I can't run and play or do things or talak and all those things then thats not living and please promise me mommy you won't make me live like that>'

At that point the mother asked him not to say anything more and that it was silly to talk like that because he was going to be with her for ever and they got off at the next stop.

I almost got off at the next stop with them just to see if that conversation went any further. But thats what is being said up here and that is coming from kids.

So what ever happens down there it's sad to see politicians can spend all this money to reinsert a feeding tube to someone that wished not to live like that when there are so many children out there just wishing for some food to live.

Anyways I see the brother and sister getting a pretty good book deal out of this if they haven't already gotten it. Check it out bet they have already been approached.

As I said these are just my thoughts and feelings in my own little world.

On the brighter side I'm going back to my comedy.

Quit smoking ciggerettes. The ads on the packages were right. Heroin is easier. Just got out of the clinic.

Also had to give up smoking pot. Apparantly my left lung is now worth $350 a gram.

You know how people donate thier bodies to science?

They are auctioning mine off to the highest bidder in the BC Marijuana Party.

Which reminds me I ran in the last election.

The cops were chasing me from a polling station.

No I did run in BC politics for the BC Marijuana Party.

I inhaled. It was part of becoming a member.

Well I'll end there in case I lose my fans and loved ones, if I have any just to amuse my self and get stuff off my chest.

I have never found anything more enjoyable then blogging.

Because it's like who actually cares.

Thank you Me and thank you God.

Oh yea and thank you Whack job...lol

I see that in the states if you don't like the way a case is handled you just go to congress and get another law passed. My, my my. What a country.

First off I had to share with my room mates right away and fill a form and sign it to sate that if I wind up like Terri please and I begged them to please pull the plug. I do not wish to live like that and I do not wish to sound mean but how would anyone wish to live like that.

 I totally agree with her husband about this.

I also said to my friends on how selfish her parents are to ddo this to her for they're own gain. What happens when they pass on, and the sister and brother don't wish to do it anymore (take care of her). Oh yea they don't have to, now the taxpayers money has to. The taxpayers money that paid congress to stay up late to decide this. The one that can't find money for good health care or to stop homelessness but can find the money to foot this bill.

I know this may sound mean but a part of me wishes she would just come alive for a few seconds just to say to her parents," what the fuck are you bastards doing to me?" then go back to that garden of peace of hers.

I know this everyone is looking at a breathing shell of a body right now. Because the true spirit of Terri is with God right now looking down going what a waste of energy these people are apending on this.

My personal feelings around this are the Mother and father got so caught up in the media that the borther and sister wanted some fame also so they jumped on the band wagon also. Hey down the road they can make book deals off this and make more money. Has anyone stopped to figure they're greed in all this as they cover it up with all this caring. Because if they really cared they would let all this end as natural as God would allow it to and let her find peace with God not this torment her so called loving family is putting her through.

One other thing how much are people paying that nurse to say what they are saying about the husband to win the publics point of view. Has anyone thought of that?

No everyone just goes to the Brother, mother, father, sister for ther lose. What lose? They lost her 15 yaers ago when this all happened. There is medical report after medical report to back this and yet still no one wants to let go and thats to bad.

The real hero in all this is the husband and what he had to go through to make his decision and yet they make him to have no feeling.

I feel her family is the heartless ones here not her husband. From what I have read from him and from his interview he had to give up someone he loved very much and was very close to and yet we still make him the bad person.

Well I really hope the courts make the right decision on this one and all turns out the way God intends not man.

My heart goes out to Terri and her Family but I'm sure noone would want to live like that and as I said where is her family going to be when they pass on and Terri is still hooked up to the tube 50 years from now? Who decides then to pull the tube?

Now I remeber where I got the fucken link in the first place it was from here at Mind say my favorite site linked me there I can't believe I forgot that. Be careful, I have to remind myself not to click on the sites that say free to the right. thats how all this began in the first place. I almost got roped again.

What  a way to spent my Saturdays. Going into places and being lied to. Good thing I like Mind Say or I'd be gone just for priciple sake. My goodness. I am so kicking my own ass now for forgetting that.

Oh well just a reminder even the sites I do trust can led me astray and just have to sy from now on I can't even take suggestions from sites i trust but I guess thats how sites like this keep alive with free ads from the FREE sites like that that pay them to run them and allow them to trick people into coming into thiuer sites so they can trick people into hanin g over thier credit card numbers which I have really learned my lesson not to do but as i say why do the sites that even carry good products have to do that I don't understand this. If you have a good product or service why one has to lie in order to get more buisness and here I am a part of a site that lets site like this place ads to do it.

Oh well big deal. I'm only one person who's going to listen to one person or even believe one person over big companies doing this to rip people off. I just totally forgot until I went to just now click on the link to one of these so called FREE to downlaod and listen to sites which is a part of the Mind Say advertising.

Well as I said good think I was a member of Mind Say before I realized this or I'd be blogging elswhere but I've been else where and Mind say is the only place that makes it so easy to do and thats what I like about them just wished they would check out who the partner up with.

Well blogging twice in one night.

I am so alone on a Saturday.

Here I am a stand up comic with nothing better to do then gripe about free web sites and blogging.

Isn't Canada and America so cool to live in. Makes me proud to be who I am.

Yet I watch the news and see the shit that goes on.

Like murdering little girls and killing innocent people and wars that should have never happened and even Canada has it's fair share of shit going on.

We just let 2 people walk away from killing a plane load of innocent people just because our RCMP and CSIS bungled the evidence and now we just wasted tax payers money from years of wasted court time.

Then we have a African Government backing rebels to kill villiges of women and children and when people come back with pictures and proof our governments go 'Oh WEll what can we do?" like this is the world we live in?

I was proud to be Canadian at on time but now I am just proud to be me and hope that God will honor me as that just a person looking for that place of peace in my own heart then maybe I'll see the real FREE to download in me.

Frustrated on a Saturday with nothing better do to. I'm a stand up comic who writes my own comedy but as I look around the world these days I ask myself wheres the humour in all this so that I may write a joke about it.

So here I sit on a Saturday waiting for a call to go out to do a gig to have a few laughs and to share some joy then I look around and see that hey maybe there is a joke somewhere in all this, then I remembered yea. We have Paul Martin that material enough on it's own...lol

Saturdays and alone, well never alone I still have God who's always with me and Jesus sits next to me and assit me in writing each of my jokes. Thats probably why I don't have colorful words in them. Now I know why?...lol Just done a gig yesterday and getting asked to do more and more which is good. Christmas was the buisiest almost everyday. Latley almost one a week. My Elton John joke is the most popular. Had quite the compliment yesterday from one of the other comics who is helping me put on a big show for July 2nd he said when I get on the stage now I have this presence that fills the stage where everyone listens and has fun with me. Never had that kind of compliment before.

Well. I think I've bitched enough for today not that anyone listens but hey this is as best a diary I'll ever have which is a good thing.

Sweet dreams, sweet life.